Understanding Acceptance

One of the most freeing — and hardest — truths I’ve learned is that most neurotypical people will never fully understand or accept the way my mind works. That’s not said from bitterness, but as a guiding principle to help me weigh up the cost of masking myself just to stay in certain dynamics.

It’s not that every neurotypical person lacks empathy or space — some do see me fully. But if I rarely feel seen and must constantly mask just to maintain relationships, I now recognize that those connections may not be worth maintaining. The cost-to-benefit ratio is too steep.

My time and energy are valuable. ADHD can erode self-worth and make it easy to forget that, but choosing where and with whom to spend my energy is a form of self-respect. Every relationship I maintain, every activity I take on — positive or negative — is my choice, conscious or not.

Therapy helps me become more conscious of those choices, uncovering areas I wasn’t fully aware of so I can act with clearer perspective and agency.

Building Sustainable Routines

A huge part of managing ADHD for me has been about creating supportive systems, not strict discipline.

  • Getting a dog wasn’t just for companionship — it met deep underlying needs: structure, movement, accountability, and daily sensory grounding.
  • Habit stacking (from Atomic Habits) has been one of the most helpful practical tools.

My daily pattern:

  1. Walk the dog →
  2. Wash the dishes →
  3. Cook food →
  4. Take a conscious rest.

By linking actions, I reduce friction and avoid decision paralysis. These small, consistent sequences help me stay regulated and create an inner sense of flow.

They’re not about productivity — they’re about rhythm, presence, and care.

A Note to My Future Self

You don’t need to fix everything overnight.
You’re already creating systems that work with your mind, not against it.
Your time and energy are valuable — and protecting them is an act of love.

When you come back to this, remember: progress is often invisible until you look back and realize how much calmer, more capable, and more yourself you’ve become.