The Effort Realization

I looked around the garden today — broken pallets, scattered tools, an old treehouse in bits, a plastic turtle pit resting in the corner like it’s been forgotten by time. My first instinct was to fix everything. Organise it. Make it right.

But something deeper stopped me.

There’s a part of me — a younger part — that still believes things have to look perfect before I can rest. That if I tidy the outside world, the inside will follow.

But I’ve lived that story before, and I know how it ends: in burnout, frustration, and a deeper feeling of being out of sync with myself.

So here’s the effort realization:

Rushing doesn’t save energy. It drains it.
Mistakes come from urgency, not slowness.
And order imposed too quickly tends to unravel just as fast.

This time, I’m doing it differently.

I’m allowing the garden — like my inner world — to be in transition.
Messy. Unfinished. Honest.

Because the truth is, I don’t have endless energy to throw at things that aren’t essential. And that’s not a flaw. That’s wisdom hard-earned.

I’m learning to:

• Let clarity guide action, not anxiety.
• Wait for the moment that feels right, instead of forcing the one that’s here.
• Honour my values and my nervous system.
• Trust that presence is more powerful than perfection.

This doesn’t mean I won’t sort the garden. I will. In time. Piece by piece.
But I’ll do it with care, not with urgency.

Because I’m not in a race.
And neither is this garden.
It’s growing — and so am I.

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🪴 Side note for myself: I might reuse the wood to create a temporary frame to store all those stones from the old path. That way I don’t waste what I’ve already paid for, and I keep the effort gentle. No pressure. No rush. Just one grounded step at a time.

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