The Love I Deserved

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This isn’t about blame.
This isn’t even about them.

It’s about naming the love I needed — and never received.
Because if I don’t name it, I’ll keep searching for it in places that can’t offer it.
And I’ll keep doubting that I was ever worthy of it to begin with.

So here it is.

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💬 The Love I Deserved

I deserved a father who softened when I cried.
I deserved a mother who saw me and smiled.
I deserved to feel wanted — not used.
Held — not handled.
Guided — not pushed out.

I deserved a home that didn’t feel like a test I was always failing.
I deserved conversations, not silence.
Warmth, not coldness disguised as strength.

I deserved to be asked what I felt — and to be listened to.
I deserved to be celebrated for who I was, not what I did.
I deserved safety without having to earn it.

I deserved a parent who said:

“I love you. I’m proud of you. I’ve got you.”

And meant it.

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🩹 Why I’m Naming This Now

Because for too long, I tried to make their version of love enough.
Tried to explain it. Understand it. Excuse it.

But the truth is — it wasn’t enough.
And no amount of inner work will make it retroactively nurturing.

Naming the love I deserved doesn’t mean I’m stuck.
It means I’m finally facing forward.

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🕯 And for My Inner Child

You were never too much.
You were never unworthy.
You didn’t ask for anything unreasonable.
You asked for love — and got confusion.
You asked for care — and got distance.

But I see you now.
And I will not let you go unseen ever again.

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This is the love I deserved.
And this is the love I’m learning to give — to myself, to my child, to the future.

One clear truth at a time.

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