The Space to Become

My end goal hasn’t changed. I still want to become a counsellor. I still believe I’ll be good at it. I still feel that call in me—to hold others, to understand them, to walk alongside them in the deep and messy places.

But maybe the timing has changed. And for the first time in my life… maybe that’s okay.

Because this might be the first season where I actually have space. Not constant pressure. Not panic. Not noise. Just time. Just enough money to not collapse into survival. Just enough freedom to ask, “Who am I really?” without rushing toward the answer.

It’s not that I’ve lost the thread—it’s that I’m learning to trust I can come back to it in a stronger way. That when I do return to training, I won’t be clinging to it for identity or validation—I’ll be walking into it already rooted.

And that feels different.

This year isn’t a failure. It’s an opportunity. Not to change who I am, but to finally have the space… to become.

And the more I reflect on the interview, the more I wonder if it was designed to give insight into how we were doing mentally—where we were, emotionally, not just academically. Maybe what I shared gave a glimpse of how much I’ve been carrying, and how much is still unfolding in my own life.

It’s not that I couldn’t have done Level 4. I probably could have pushed through. But maybe I’m realising… I shouldn’t have to push. There’s already a lot in my life. I’m a single parent. I’m rebuilding. I’m still learning how to be.

And maybe my tutor saw that. Maybe she was right.

So maybe this year isn’t just space. Maybe it’s grace.