The Subtle Physics of Being Seen

This morning, I said “morning” to a stranger having a cigarette outside.

It was a micro-gesture. But it mattered. It reminded me I exist.

When you live alone — really alone — those small confirmations that you’re a part of the fabric of the world can feel like oxygen. It’s not about long conversations or someone knowing your life story. Sometimes it’s just about being registered. A nod. A shared glance. A moment where your presence lands.

Yesterday I didn’t connect with a single person. Not one. And that night, I ate a lot of lemon cake. I didn’t feel particularly sad at the time — but I think my nervous system was. It was like it hadn’t been acknowledged all day, and it reached for something solid, something sweet, something that would say, yes, you’re still here.

Today was different. I saw a few people in the park. Said hello. Had a small chat about dogs. It wasn’t anything grand, but it grounded me. And I noticed: when I connect in the morning, the craving for cake in the evening — that deep, quiet ache for comfort — softens. I think it’s because I’ve already been seen.

Noticed another thing too: there’s a woman I see most mornings, and today she chose to go the other way. Maybe it was just her route, or maybe she didn’t want to talk. That stung a little. But I didn’t take it as hard as I might have in the past. I still talked to other people. I still showed up.

Even the fact that I’m noticing this — that I’m observing these micro-moments and how they impact me — feels important. It means I’m not numb. I’m not fully disappearing. I’m still here.

So, here’s the quiet experiment I’m running: I’m going to continue these small acts of visibility. A gentle hello. A bit of eye contact. Not to force anything, but just to keep myself grounded in the world.

Because maybe there is a subtle physics to being seen. Not flashy or dramatic. Just soft gravitational pulls, helping me remember that I belong here.

Question to reflect on:
When was the last time someone truly saw you — and when was the last time you truly saw someone else?