A Pause That’s Not a Step Back

I thought I had to keep going.

Keep healing. Keep working. Keep proving something — maybe to myself, maybe to the world.
I thought Level 4 was the next step I had to take. That I couldn’t afford to pause.

But today, I see it differently.

Taking a year out isn’t a step back. It’s a decision made with care.
Because what matters right now isn’t a qualification.
It’s how I show up for my son.

These are the years he’ll remember. The ones that shape him.
And if I’m too stretched, too distracted, too emotionally depleted — then what am I really offering?

I’ve done a lot of inner work. I’ve faced pain I didn’t think I could survive.
And maybe now… maybe it’s okay to live a little more.
To stop trying to fix everything.
To stop treating healing like a project.

Maybe this year isn’t about breakthroughs.
Maybe it’s about being here.
Really being here.
With him. With myself. With what’s real.

I still love the idea of being a therapist.
But not at the cost of the relationship that matters most to me.

So I’m pausing.
Not because I’ve failed.
But because I’m finally listening to what matters now.

Reflective Question for You:
What are you pushing for — and is it aligned with what truly matters most in this season of your life?